‘Pinto-Bird’ | Rupaul
(Dad changed the words of this song just for me so I bob up and down and dance with excitement when he plays it)
What is your favourite toy and why?
I have SO many toys in and outside of my cage but my favourite things are laces. Laces and drawstrings. Whether it be on shoes, hoodies, or tracksuit pants i can literally spend hours pulling, chewing and tugging on these. Why you ask? well, I have no idea. I just hear them constantly begging for me to play with them, even on strangers.
How does it feel to be the most desirable pet on earth?
I get told I am beautiful and cute on a daily basis. People literally get out their phones to take pictures of me the moment they see me so naturally i have learned to pose for the cameras. How do you want me? crest up? or crest down?
What is the funniest thing you have ever done?
While my dad was cooking dinner, I was busy playing with the Apple TV remote control. Before I knew it, I had purchased a movie for my dad to watch – Downsizing – the movie started to play and dad ran over to see what I had done. Oh, how we laughed! True story!
What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?
Dad was eating a pizza once and I really don’t know what came over me. I remember flying at lightning speed from my cage and landing on the soft, wet and very red pizza base. Dad was a little shocked so I thought I better let him eat alone so I started doing flight laps around the living room spreading a trail of red tomato joy everywhere I went. I am not sure why I was then abruptly put in my bedroom.
Who is your favourite family member and why?
Dad. He always makes sure I have plenty of social time even if it means he has to get up early before work to do so. He always makes sure I have a great diet, fresh supply of veggies, mung beans, corn and seed every day. He only puts me in my room when he goes to work or when I have to go bed, otherwise he always lets me be by his side.
If you could be granted three wishes, what they be?
Seed. Millet. More seed.
Who or what inspires you?
Dad. He is constantly saying things like ‘hello’, ‘whatyadoin’, ‘I love you’ and ‘Pinto!’. I really want to say it back but I haven’t quite worked how how to do that yet. The best I can do is scream.
If you won lotto, how would you spend the money?
Seed. Millet. More seed.
What did you last dream about?
Seed and millet.
What would your autobiography be called?
Wake up! with Pinto! (Alarm clock not needed).
What’s your favourite thing to do when the rest of the family is asleep?
Beak grind and have a little chatter to myself.
Why do you wait until Dad is fully dressed and ready to go to work before you poop on his shoulder?
Easy! So he take a piece of me wherever he goes!